How to Keep a Long Distance Relationship Alive
- Michael Smith
- Posted on
It’s all too simple to idealize and romanticize each other when two individuals are apart. It’s easy to miss the little but significant distinctions. It’s easy to get caught up in our thoughts’ drama rather than the peaceful and mundane realities of our hearts.
Having a partner to whom you can turn when you’re having a bad day is the most wonderful feeling in the world. Reneturrek.com has the finest long distance relationship quotes to help you and your partner become closer.
So, do you think it’ll work? Yes, it is possible. Is it effective? No, most of the time. But then again, the great majority of relationships are like that. That isn’t to say we shouldn’t give it our best go. Here’s what we have discovered about surviving long distances:
1. YOU NEED SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO TOGETHER.
One of the things that kill long-distance relationships is the underlying uncertainty of everything. Those top-of-the-page queries have the capacity to take over one’s mind. If you’re in a condition of doubt, you’ll ponder aloud, “Has everything been fair?” “Does she still feel the same way about me as she did before?” “Is he secretly meeting other women and I’m not aware of it?
The longer you’ve been away, the more these doubts might turn into genuine existential crises. That’s why, in order to make any long-distance relationship work, you need to have a date that you both look forward to.
This is usually the next time you will both be able to see each other. It might also be other important life events, such as applying for employment in the other person’s city, shopping for residences in which you could both be happy, or taking a trip together. After you no longer have something to look forward to, it will be more difficult to maintain the same level of enthusiasm and optimism in each other.
One thing that all relationships have in common is that if they aren’t developing, they are dying. In a long-distance relationship, progress is even more important. There must be some common aim you’re working for. You must be united by a common purpose at all times. On the horizon, there must be a convergent trajectory. You’ll eventually drift away if you don’t.
2. DON’T JUDGE IMMEDIATELY.
When people are isolated from one another, a curious thing occurs psychologically: we are unable to view each other as we actually are. When we are separated from one another or have limited exposure to a person or situation, we begin to develop a variety of assumptions and judgments that are either exaggerated or utterly incorrect.
Within a long-distance relationship, this might present itself in a variety of ways. Because they regard every casual social excursion as potentially hazardous to a relationship, some individuals become furiously jealous or unreasonably possessive.
In other circumstances, individuals become highly critical and neurotic, to the point that every little thing that goes wrong is seen as a probable breakup. So the power goes out, and their partner misses their nightly Skype call—this is the end of the relationship; he’s finally forgotten about me.
Remind yourself that you have no idea what’s going on and that the greatest thing you can do at any time speaks to your spouse about how they’re feeling as well as how you’re feeling.
3. MAKE COMMUNICATION A Sequential OPTION
Many long-distance couples establish restrictions such as having a set amount of calls or talking every night at a certain hour. This strategy may work for some, but communication should take place naturally.
You should speak with one another only when you want to, not when you feel compelled to. And if it means not communicating for a few days, then be it. After all, people are busy. And taking a few days off every now and again is really beneficial to your health.
Communication is certainly crucial in any relationship, but in a long-distance relationship, more communication isn’t necessari
The simplest approach to prevent this blunder is to make all communication voluntary, which means you can both drop out at any moment. The key is to not take these opt-outs personally when they occur—after all, your partner is not your servant. It’s entirely up to them to determine whether they’re having a hectic week or need some alone time. However, you must take advantage of your partner’s and your own willingness to communicate.
4. VEIFY THAT THE DISTANCE IS ONLY TEMPORARY.
Without hope, a long-distance relationship will die. And for hope, there has to be a chance that the two persons may one day be together and live happily ever after. Everything else will rapidly become worthless without that common vision of Happily Ever After.
Keep in mind that love isn’t enough. You both need to have similar life goals, shared beliefs, and same hobbies. You must not only have a shared vision of a potential future for you and your partner, but you must also feel as though you are both striving toward that goal.
But is it worth it?
This is the most common question we get from readers. Yes, it’s always worth it on one level. Because you would learn a lot about yourself, connection, and commitment even if the relationship ends in disaster.
On anther level, it’s difficult to say. Because you don’t truly know what it’s like to date the other person when you’re in a long-distance relationship. Instead, you merely have a half-formed, hazy concept. Sure, you have a general idea of their personality and appealing features, but you don’t have a whole picture.
You can’t have a feel for a relationship until you’re in it, in person, and constantly in each other’s faces, whether you want to be or not. True intimacy may be found right there in the cramped personal space between two individuals who have spent much too much time with one other.
This closeness isn’t always passionate, isn’t always boisterous, and isn’t always pleasant. It is, nonetheless, true. And it’s a true closeness that determines whether or not a relationship will continue.
This suffocating closeness is never able to grow in a meaningful manner because of the distance. Relationships may be challenging and confusing. However, few individuals are aware that there are certain rather obvious signs that indicate whether or not a relationship will succeed.